And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
Randomize
