Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
Randomize