I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
