...so i touched it.
You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
Randomize
