i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize