Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
Randomize
