ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
Randomize
