I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
Last night when I was hammered I set a reminder to tell you that your boobs are my favorite ones in the world, so this is me giving you that message.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
Randomize
