I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
My mind's like "He's a sexist pig" but my uterus is like "YOU SHALL BEAR HIM STRONG CHILDREN"
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
Ladies don't puke and tell
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
Randomize
