Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
I just gave her a sobriety test in the middle of the baking aisle.
And the results, officer?
She's fucked.
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
Randomize
