even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
Randomize
