I'm doing a half mile walk of shame carrying a trash bag and still very drunk. Save me. I feel like a refugee.
I'm sitting in the drive through at Mcdonalds right now watching the workers pressure wash the vomit I left from last night.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
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