she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
I love you. Go after that dick
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Randomize
