Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
Randomize