He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
my nextdoor neighbor called me saying "um hey, your mom just stumbled into bed with me and my husband, can you please come get her?"
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
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