you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
GOOD IDEA: Stealing the bike a couple blocks away so I don't have to walk. BAD IDEA: riding bike for the first time in years drunk as hell. I'm bleeding and my body hurts and once again I can't find my car.
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
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She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
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I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
When i was leaving for work this morning, i realized the neighbor was passed out drunk, with no pants, and a half eaten whopper on my lawn. Knowing that hey..we have all been there before.. i decided to give him a pillow and a blanket rather than wake him up.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
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