She's JV to your varsity
Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
Seriously. If I'd known all it took was a 29 year old UPS guy to make me feel THIS SEXY, I'd have been fucking them for 30 years.
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
Randomize
