mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
jump out the window naked night went bad
Randomize