Fuck appropriateness.
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
Randomize