So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
I was so drunk last night i ate cereal with a fork.
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
I want to be your penis for a week.
By cross-referencing our messages & her Twitter feed, I've deduced that she was eating spaghetti the whole time we were sexting.
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
Randomize
