I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
I'm watching my cat lick a used condom wrapper on my nightstand and I'm too hungover to move and do anything about it. Tequila Tuesdays can not be a thing.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
Randomize