we're chasing vodka with high fives
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
Let me set the mood for you. Do you remember Britney Spears in her Hit Me Baby One More Time era? Well I just fucked this college girl I shit you not her name is Persephone and she looks exactly like Britney Spears back when she was hot. I might be in love.
Randomize
