wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
Being sober is boring. Tomorrow I'm def bringing wine and my vibrator to work. Might even booty call that hot guy on floor 5. Making the last week at this job legendary.
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
Randomize
