what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
Randomize
