i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
Randomize
