one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
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