Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
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