At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
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