im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
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