Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask