Hey sorry for feelin' up your date. Sadly, this is a mass txt.
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
I was fine until "Under Pressure" came on the radio. It's like God wanted me to shit my pants on the drive home.
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
You left me a note that said "The Earth is blowing up. Bring the Rosé." WTF.
Randomize
