Did I ever tell you that the first person i made out with cried?
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
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