talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
I force fed him french fries and then proceeded to tell him how sexy corgi’s are … it’s safe to say he’s not texting me for a second date.
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
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