I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
I hear youre working today. To keep you entertained, ive compiled a list of condiments that my dick has NOT been slathered in since last Friday: Relish, and raspberry jam. That's right.
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
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