Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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