Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
Found my phone laying in a snow angel outside my apt this morning.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
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