Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
After so many times of carrying your puked covered clothes home in a bag on a Tuesday morning, you begin to realize that Fucked Up Mondays aren't a real thing.
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
