sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
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