Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
Randomize