omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
Randomize
