The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
we're so committed to being not committed
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
Randomize
