But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
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