next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
Randomize
