Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
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