apparently i'm not the first person wake up and realize she's ugly cuz i tore this house apart and there is no sign of my clothes
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
Randomize
