I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
Randomize
