i just looked at my contacts and realized i saved the pizza hut girl's number as "fckucin pizza" the other night.
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
Randomize
