i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
Some chick asked if she could eat me because I'm dressed as a taco. I introduced her to RJ. Best Wingman.
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
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