So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
Randomize
