dude i woke up to 20 missed calls from you, 3 from a blocked number and had 13 voicemails that all said "send me a picture of your tits."
so im guessing thats a no.....
I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
The sigh of relief when u realize none of your drunk texts will result in permanent damage
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
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