Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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